


Theory of Life

by orphan_account



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Angst with a Happy Ending, Bottom Levi (Shingeki no Kyojin), Emotional/Psychological Abuse, First Kiss, Fluff and Angst, Late Night Conversations, Levi Wears Glasses, M/M, Mental Breakdown, POV First Person, Panic Attacks, Physical Abuse, Rape, Slow Build, Suicide Attempt, Tooth-Rotting Fluff, Top Eren Yeager
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-06-11
Updated: 2016-06-11
Packaged: 2018-07-14 11:45:01
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,109
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7169675
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>His mother had died just few days ago and now he was here, hiding under his bed, hoping that maybe Kenny will forget about him as tears rolled down his cheeks. He didn't. </p><p>And things just started to go so well too after he met the boy with blue eyes.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Theory of Life

My mother died two nights ago. Maybe it was three nights already. I have no idea.

When I overheard my uncle calling the ambulance that night, I knew it was over. Everything we had built together as a family was quickly tumbling down to the point of no return. Kenny would start drinking again and my mother will be six feet underground. Who knows if I won't follow soon after if Kenny will be getting drunk every other night.

The fear of being beat to death was something that was controlling, not allowing me to go out of my bedroom. I feared that the moment I would step out of my badly lit room, Kenny would hit me with a bottle. He was capable of doing that.

Even though the sun was shinning outside brightly, my room was filled with darkness. I didn't want to be seen or see others. I was happy by myself. Slowly, I hugged my pillow tighter, taking a deep breath from it. It was my mother's - it smelled like her too.

I already missed her so much. It already felt like years since I got to hug her tightly. Maybe it indeed was already few years and I had spent them all in my bed.

The next thing I knew was happening, was thar someone knocked on my door. Looking up from my pillow, I focused on my door. I just hope it was my imagination. That I was going crazy. But it wasn't.

"Levi? Are you awake, kid?" At that moment, I knew it was Kenny who was knocking. The doors opened and there he stood. He had huge bags under his eyes and messy hair. Just like me. Slowly, he opened up his arms, waiting for me to come to him and hug him.

I knew he was going through the same hell I was at the moment. If I don't count myself, my mother was his last living relative. Now, she was gone without saying a goodbye. Not to me. Not to him.

Sitting up, I stared at him, not knowing if this was an act to try to lure me out. He can have a bottle placed right next to my doors.

"Hey, come and give your uncle a hug. The past few days were hard for both of us and you know it very well." His voice sounded rather broken; like he hadn't spoken for days. Gulping, I slowly lifted myself from the bed and walked over to him.

My hair was starting to be greasy and after being in the same clothes for the past few days, I've felt like some homeless guy who hasn't showered in days. Hesitantly, I wrapped my arms around his waist before leaning into his chest. He returned the hug and rested his head on mine. Great, he wasn't planning on killing me tonight.

His breath didn't stink of alcohol, which was a good sign. Finally, I let myself relax into his hold, letting him rock both of us slightly.

"I know you miss her," he whispered, his large hands rubbing my back. "We all do. But right now, we have to be strong. We will work this out together, alright?" Hesitantly, I nodded my head into his chest, feeling the soft fabric of his shirt rub against my cheek.

This was not like him. Nor like me. We never hugged each other. We barely spoke together. And now we're here, standing in my doorway, my arms wrapped against his stomach area as tears slowly traced down my cheeks. "It's okay," he whispered, his hands now in my hair as he pulled me gently away and brushed some strands of hair away from my eyes.

All the stress from the past few days finally fell down on me, breaking me into something that I could only call a sobbing mess. The pain of realization that my mother was gone forever had hit me hard.

It didn't take me long before I was taking deep breaths, trying to calm down. Kenny, who stood there the whole time, was trying to calm me down, shushing me like I was a small child that just woke up from a bad nightmare.

At one point, he sighed and picked me up, my body probably light as a feather in his arms. My thoughts were confirmed when he made a comment about it, telling me I need to gain a pound or two.

Slowly, he put my weeping body on a sofa that was sat in front a fireplace, a large tv on top of it. I jerked when I felt Kenny wrap me in one of thous fat blankets.

He then left into the kitchen, leaving me alone in the room. Well, not really. My eyes traced down to the fireplace to see a small black ball of fur sitting in front me, staring up at me with huge blue eyes.

A small sad smile crossed my face as I picked the kitten up with my hands, letting him curl up on my chest. It purred softly, nuzzling its face into my blanket.

I've found it on the street few months ago and couldn't resist the way it's eyes shined. We ended up naming him Titan. Because why not?

Slowly, I started to caress its soft fur. And to be honest, I found it rather calming. It was nice knowing that the kitten wasn't capable of hating me. It had indeed used its claws against me, but luckily only during the time we were playing.

Another small smile spread across my face and I buried the side of my head into it's fur, listening to the purring. Finally, it felt like I had a little bit if peace.

Until now.

"It's nice seeing you interact with someone; or rather something." That was the moment I almost jumped from the sofa still with Titan in my hands. That's how much he scared me.

Kenny just laughed before offering me some tea. I took it without hesitation.

/:/:/

The funeral was a week later. To my surprise, a lot of people showed up. I didn't know most of them. Through the whole ceremony, I've kept quite and just listened to the priest talking. Sometimes, my ears would register  
some sobs coming from everywhere.

By some chance, I didn't end up carrying the coffin, Kenny stating that even before we would get to her grave, they would need to prepare one for me too.

Ha Ha.

But in the end, who could blame him for saying a joke at a moment like this. The two of us were the most stressed out. The rest of these people probably at the end of the day forget about my mother.

The snapping of someone's fingers made me finally come back to reality. I was sitting in a rather old car with Kenny in the driver's seat. Behind me sat two small children, probably not older than 10.

One of the cars broke down and we had to take them with us. Thank God they were at least quite.

"I need you to stay awake for now. We will be in the restaurant soon." Oh, right. There was still a farewell party to attend to.

To be honest, I really didn't want to go there. Everyone will be staring and pitying us the whole time. Like they did in the cemetery.

"Why can't I just stay in the car? It's not like I'm hungry anyway." That was a lie. And a huge one. At this point, I was starving. Kenny just shook his head 'no', before returning back to driving.

It took us another 10 minutes before we got to the restaurant. Its name was Maria. How original.

"Okay, kids. We're here. Get out and go to your parents." And they did go. Running out of the car as fast as possible. Raising an eyebrow, I gave Kenny a look. "I think you've scared them."

He just laughs and gets out of the car, shutting the door behind himself. And here I was, alone and in the dark. The sun was slowly starting to set too, giving the sky a nice mix of yellow, orange and red. The restaurant was right next to a beach too, which made the sunset even more beautiful as the sun began to set behind the ocean.

That moment, I wished I had my colored pencils with me.

Signing, I finally got my butt out of the car, closing the doors behind me. We never bothered to lock the car, since it looked like shit anyway.

I casted a last glance at the sunset, smiling a bit. Truly, it was beautiful.

Then, I've got an idea. There was a high chance no one would realise I was missing if I would skip out on the dinner. Not giving it a second thought, I ran as fast as my tired feet could carry me across the street and down a small hill. Quickly, I took of my shoes and socks before running further down the beach. The feeling of the sand between my fingers was amazing. For once in two weeks, I've felt at peace.

The moment my feet had hit the water, I stopped, rolling up the pant legs.  The scenery was even more breathtaking from up close.

This was something I wished never ended. The wind slowly pushing be backwards and the waves getting a bit bigger each time they roll up upon shore.

"It's beautiful, isn't it?" An unfamiliar voice was something I didn't expect at all. I turned on my heel just to see a boy around my age. He was probably a bit older than me.

As he began to walk closer to me, I took a step back, forgetting about the water behind me. My foot sank into the sand, making me panic and fall back. This was it. Kenny was going to murder me in cold blood if I came back wet and covered in sand from head to toe.

That was the moment the boy grabbed my arm, pushing me back into him. "Whoa, you gotta be careful," he joked and pulled me back a bit. My eyes met his and my body froze. Never had I've seen such a perfect shade of blue with green mixed to it.

He gave me a grin and said:" you're Levi, right?" And at that point I knew my uncle had sent him for me. Probably was thinking that I driven off with his car to fucking Maryland.

I nodded and he just smiled back. "Kenny said that I should go look for you. He sounded a bit worried." There was silence for a while. "Well, I must say that his description was definitely right to the smallest detail."

Yea. A short guy with black hair and looks like he haven't slept for months. Plus, he looks like a 10-year-old from afar.

I bet that was the way he described me. "Oh, by the way, I'm Eren."  For a second, I had to imagine how my name would sound if it came out of my mouth. That shit-eating grin of his wasn't helping. At all.

"Anyway, wanna head back? The wind is picking up and it will be raining soon probably." I gave him a quick nod, before looking back at the ocean for a moment.

Finally, I turned and started to go back, picking up my shoes and socks along the way.

Kenny, not to my surprise, was indeed not that worried. He was probably more worried about the car.

"Took you long enough, Levi," he said and walked over to me, throwing his arm around my shoulders. His breath smelled of alcohol and that's when my body froze. I knew what would happen if he got drunk. Fuck.

"I'm sorry. Wanna hed inside?" I suggested, my breath hitched. Kenny just shrugged and took out a cigaret. I knew what that ment. 'Go. I'll be out here.'

I nodded without the two of us having to exchange a lot of words. To be honest, I started to be afraid. When he get's drunk, he does things that even the wort criminals would probably cringe at.

I grabbed Eren by his upper arm and gave him a forced smile. "How about we go inside? You could give me some details about yourself." He looked down at me and then nodded, smiling back. "Yeah. While we're at it, we could get some food. I'm starving." I couldn't object. I glanced back at Kenny who was too interested in his cigaret to even care.

"Yeah, we could."

**Author's Note:**

> So, hey. This is my first fanfic and I hope you've enjoyed it so far. 
> 
> It may not seem like it, but this will probably have a slow build. Like, really slow build. Anyways, I would love if you gave me a comment on this story. It would let me know that people want to read this. 
> 
> Anyway, thanks again guys.


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